Misconceptions Regarding the Status of Women in Islam

By [student's name removed]


NOT!

This paper was not written in the summer of 2003 by a Muslim student in the "Introduction to the Study of Religion" course.

Rather, this student PLAGIARIZED this material from at least two Web sources:

http://www.alislam.org/library/links/00000144.html

http://www.submission.org/polygamy.html 

 - LES

(I'm sorry to say I did not catch this at the time but I'm leaving this here so my current and future students may see an example of pure Web plagiarizing. All it takes is to Google a few key phrases to locate any such copying from Web sources. These days I will regularly Google suspect phrases I read in student papers. If I catch you doing this I give you a zero for the paper. Do it again and you fail the class!)


Lately, there have been many superstitions, misconceptions and stereotypes assigned to Islam and especially status of women in Islam. Men and women are equal in the sight of God, but in view of the differences in their nature, they have been assigned different roles for the smooth functioning of the human society. Women have the unique ability to bear children and to nurture them and men are physically stronger. In an Islamic society, women can occupy three positions:

  1. First as a daughter, her importance is such that the Holy Prophet of Islam tells us: 'He who brings up his daughters well, and makes no distinction between them and his sons, will be close to me in Paradise.' (Hadith)1
  2. Secondly, a woman can be a wife. The character of men in an Islamic society is established in relationship to their treatment of women. 'The best from among you is one who behaves best towards his wife.' (Hadith) 
  3. Thirdly, in her role as a mother, Islam has placed women at a higher status than men. 'Paradise is at the feet of the mother.' (Hadith). Islam recognizes the great role that women play in upbringing of the children and that the future of mankind and of societies depends on mothers. Therefore, mothers have been placed at a position of the highest respect. 

The high respect which God commands us to hold for women in Islam also dictates that women have to behave with utmost dignity and piety in order to become the most respected and honored segment of our society. Another very common misconception comes into the play when we talk about the modest dress of Muslim women. Ask yourselves this question. 'Why did nuns used to dress very modestly and cover their heads?' Because they were supposed to be very noble and very pure. In both the Old Testament and the Bible, a head covering is prescribed for chaste women. A paradigm which comes from misinterpretation of the Bible is that Eve was responsible to make Adam sin, therefore there is an implication in Christianity that women are impure and that association with them diminishes a man. That is why priest and nuns were told not to marry if they wanted to be close to God. Islam denies the theory of the original sin. God tells us in the Holy Qur'an that all human beings are created pure and that both men and women are capable of achieving the highest degree of spirituality.

Going back to the question of modest dressing, nuns dressed modestly because they did not intend to marry therefore did not want to attract the attention of members of the opposite sex. But Islam wants all women to be pure, and all men also - no double standards in Islam. What you wear affects both how you feel about yourself and how others view you. For example, at my school - Virginia Tech - which is not air conditioned, the principal and professors always wears a suits, no matter how hot it is. Teachers and parents know that well dressed children feel good about themselves, and teachers subconsciously view them as well cared for and treat them better. Well dressed children do better in school. Many public schools are now adopting uniform policies for the students because wearing a uniform puts the student in a learning mood and makes the teachers view them as potential learners. This affects both the student and the teacher's behavior so that the entire atmosphere becomes conducive to learning. 

Now, let's reflect on marriage and women. Islamic society is a society in which the institution of marriage plays a vital part. The Holy Qur'an describes the relationship between husband and wife in a beautiful manner: 

"They are a sort of garment for you and you are a sort of garment for them. A garment embellishes, protects, safeguards, gives dignity and honor. It's a beautiful relationship based on love and respect and characterized by grace: Consort with them graciously..." (Qur'an, 4:20) 

In order to allow women the opportunity to fulfill the challenging obligation of producing these moral individuals who will become members of the Islamic society, the responsibility for providing for the family has been placed on men (discussed in class). They are appointed as protectors of the members of their household. 

"Men are appointed guardians over women..." (Qur'an, 3:35) 

Just as in any system, different individuals are assigned different roles for the optimum functioning of the system, similarly, in the family unit, man is the head of the household (even though they say that the woman is the neck and turns the head the way she wishes). This does not imply superiority or inferiority in any way, just difference in roles because the functions men and women each play in the family unit are different. In the family unit, the men bears the ultimate responsibility for providing that pious and safe haven of love and comfort called the Islamic home within which paradise is formed under the feet of mothers during the course of the sacred task of the moral upbringing of the children. In return, men receive obedience and support from their spouse. God instructs parents to pray for the success of this sacred duty, because seeking God's help through prayer is a necessary precursor to every endeavor of a Muslim.

Therefore, in order for a society to be a pure society, both men and women should think, dress, and behave in ways that allow pure thoughts and actions to dominate the way of life and create a social climate conducive to the achievement of the real goal of life, the achievement of communion with our God, our Creator. Physical attraction between men and women is good and pure only within the context of the sacred institution of marriage. 

Another very common misconception about women in Islam and women in man other traditions is women's menstrual period. Many religions and traditions believe that women is "unclean" during this period and should not be approached or touched in any way. However, in my opinion this is just a controversy. While women in Islam should not be approached sexually during their menstrual period, other than that they are treated completely normal as if nothing is happening. In my opinion, most of the theory that "women are unclean and dirty" in general comes from the theory of the original sin and it is followed solely by Christian traditions.

Marriage and divorce as well as treatment of women in Islam is yet another common misconception not just among followers of other traditions but among Muslims as well. Polygamy was a way of life until the Qur'an was revealed 1400 years ago. When the earth was young and under-populated, polygamy was one way of populating it and bringing in the human beings needed to carry out God's plan. By the time the Qur'an was revealed, the world had been sufficiently populated, and the Qur'an put down the first limitations against polygamy.

Polygamy is permitted in the Qur'an, but under strictly observed circumstances. Any abuse of this divine permission incurs severe retribution. Thus, although polygamy is permitted by God, it behooves us to examine our circumstances carefully before saying that a particular polygamous relationship is permissible.

Our perfect example here is the prophet Muhammad. He was married to one wife, Khadijah, until she died. He had all his children, except one, from Khadijah. Thus, she and her children enjoyed the Prophet's full attention for as long as she was married to him; twenty-five years. For all practical purposes, Muhammad had one wife - from the age of 25 to 50. During the remaining 13 years of his life, he married the aged widows of his friends who left many children. The children needed a complete home, with a fatherly figure, and the Prophet provided that. Providing a fatherly figure for orphans is the only specific circumstance in support of polygamy mentioned in the Qur'an (4:3):

"If you deem it best for the orphans, you may marry their mothers - you may marry two, three, or four. If you fear lest you become unfair, then you shall be content with only one, or with what you already have. Additionally, you are thus more likely to avoid financial hardship."

Other than marrying widowed mothers of orphans, there were three political marriages in the Prophet's life. His close friends Abu Bakr and Omar insisted that he marry their daughters, Aisha and Hafsah, to establish traditional family ties among them. The third marriage was to Maria the Egyptian; she was given to him as a political gesture of friendship from the ruler of Egypt. This perfect example tells us that a man must give his full attention and loyalty in marriage to his wife and children in order to raise a happy and wholesome family.

The Qur'an emphasizes the limitations against polygamy in very strong words: 

"If you fear lest you may not be perfectly equitable in treating more than one wife, then you shall be content with one." (Qur'an, 4:3) 

"You cannot be equitable in a polygamous relationship, no matter how hard you try." (Qur'an, 4:129)

The Qur'anic limitations against polygamy point out the possibility of abusing God's law. Therefore, unless we are absolutely sure that God's law will not be abused (meaning that we treat our women the same and that we are marrying them for the sake of their orphans) we had better resist our lust and stay away from polygamy. If the circumstances do not dictate polygamy, we had better give our full attention to one wife and one set of children. The children's psychological and social well-being, especially in countries where polygamy is prohibited, almost invariably dictate monogamy. A few basic criteria must be observed in contemplating polygamy:

  1. It must alleviate pain and suffering and not cause any pain or suffering.
  2. If you have a young family, it is almost certain that polygamy is an abuse.
  3. Polygamy to substitute a younger wife is an abuse of God's law in (4:19):

"O you who believe, it is not lawful for you to inherit what the women leave behind, against their will. You shall not force them to give up anything you had given them, unless they commit a proven adultery. You shall treat them nicely. If you dislike them, you may dislike something wherein GOD has placed a lot of good." (Qur'an, 4:19).


  1. Collection of saying of Holy Prophet Muhammed that have been recorded and are reliable to be true since they have a chain of people who carried them through generations. Hadiths given here are paraphrases of the actual Hadiths that I have memorized so for that reason I do not have the citation for them.

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